How do people who are d, learn to cope?

Thank you for sharing this very difficult story. It's horrible that the person (so-called-person) is not being held responsible but I certainly understand why you wouldn't want to go through the reporting process, trial, whatever. You are already in group and individual counseling which is what I would have recommended. It's compounded by the loss of your father. Are you not able to fully disclose your feelings in your counseling sessions? Maybe you need to see your doctor and get on some medication to help deal with the "post traumatic" part of it. It doesn't have to be forever but it can help in combination with your counseling sessions. It concerns me that it has been so long since the attack and you are not feeling better. I'm sure you have heard that it is not your fault and that you shouldn't be ashamed. You are the VICTIM! The fact that you can't get close to your boyfriend suggests that you need more counseling or a different kind of counseling. I think you need to talk to your doctor. Please talk to your doctor and if you don't feel helped by him or her, find another doctor to help you. At least medication can help you sleep at night. Not sleeping can mess up your whole world. Believe me. Maybe you need another counselor. And if you have built a relationship with this counselor, they will not take it personally if you have to change. You have to make decisions that are good for you and will make you better. God bless you, honey. There is hope. It will get better. I'm so sorry that this happens in the world.